Pleasing others protected you. It feels safe. But at what cost? We'll work to identify your needs, your worth, and your right to take up space.

Discovering who you are, underneath everything you were told to be can feel like a relief and a reckoning at the same time. Whether you're questioning your gender or sexuality, piecing together a cultural identity that is multi-dimensional, or just know something doesn't fit but can't quite name it yet, we can figure it out together.

Maybe you always seem to date a certain type of person, or have a go-to defense in arguments that goes nowhere. We'll take a look at your attachment history and how old wounds may be impacting your relationships.

Change is scary. Making big decisions can be intimidating. You don't have to figure it all out on your own. We'll explore your fears and emotions emerging with these big changes, as well as identify your resources, strengths, and support systems to get you through.

Walking away from a faith that isn't serving you takes strength and courage. Even if you might have left, the fear and shame may still remain--not to mention the grief of losing community and a sense of who you were. We'll attend to the wounds and clarify what values you wish to take with you and which you wish to leave behind.

Whether you're single or partnered, sexual or ACE, I can support you toward clarifying your needs, desires, and sexual relationship with yourself and others, to invite the pleasure you deserve into your life.

The way you see yourself didn't spring from nowhere. It was shaped by the people around you, the cultures you grew up in, and the messages you absorbed before you were old enough to question them. We'll trace those threads together and figure out which you want to hold onto and which are no longer serving you.

The transition to parenthood is one of many joys, and also can be one of grief, isolation, and massive shifts in identity. Society doesn't encourage new parents to share their vulnerabilities and complex emotions, especially ones that don't align with the ideal picture-perfect image of a happy parent. This is a space where you can show up fully and make space for all of the emotions that come with this huge change.

Maybe you find yourself dreading the thought of going home for the holidays. Or you can't quite seem to connect fully with that one (or several) family member. We'll unpack wounds that may have been passed down through the generations and maybe even grieve the family you longed for, while also developing empathy and forgiveness for loved ones that might have caused you pain.

Somewhere along the way, you stopped reaching for each other. Maybe it happened gradually through many micro-moments, or maybe there was a rupture that changed things. We'll explore what is getting in the way of connection and rebuild the pathways back to one another.

Betrayal can feel like a gut punch to the heart. It can rewrite the story you thought you were living and make you question everything. We'll make space for both the grief and the complexity, and figure out a path forward.

Who does what, and why do partners often feel unseen for their efforts? We'll shine a light on the invisible labor, the resentment it can build, how power and identity influence each of your roles, and how to have conversations about it to get to a good balance.

Merging two families means merging two sets of rules, routines, and loyalties, and it rarely happens smoothly. We'll work through the loyalty binds, boundary questions, and growing pains of building a family that may look different than what you initially thought you would have.

Anyone who has parented together knows that it can be challenging to be on the same page. We'll work through differences in parenting style, beliefs and values, and the mental load so you're building a united front instead of competing ones.

When the house gets quiet, what's left between the two of you? We'll help you rediscover each other outside of the roles you've played for years, and figure out what this next chapter looks like.

Endings can be devastating. They can be even more painful and complicated when you have children or very intertwined lives. There is a way to uncouple with care, we'll walk through this difficult time together.

Taking the next step to building a life together is exciting, comes with lots of fun moments of learning more about one another, and some difficult moments...of learning more about one another. We'll navigate the transition into a shared home with less friction and more ease.

Different cultures often mean different expectations around communication, conflict, and even what love is supposed to look like. We'll get curious about where your worlds differ and build a shared language that honors both.

Your families of origin taught you what relationships, roles, and obligation are supposed to look like, and those lessons don't always agree with each other, or with what you actually want. We'll untangle whose voices you're hearing and help you amplify yours.

Being in a relationship shouldn't mean losing the parts of yourself that make you, you. We'll explore how to stay rooted in your own identity, and see how the relationship can simultaneously appreciate your differences and weave your cultures into a unique story.

Culture and identity shape how you fight, how you show love, and how you're perceived as a couple in the world, sometimes in ways that are hard to name. We'll attune to power dynamics and play and bring language to what's often left unspoken.

Carrying the weight of discrimination, microaggressions, or feeling othered takes a toll, on you individually and on the relationship. We'll make space to process that stress and protect your connection from absorbing all of it.

Patterns of conflict, communication, or care get passed down and are difficult to change without bringing awareness and intention to them. We'll trace where yours came from and decide together what you want to carry forward and what you're ready to leave behind.

You've always been in monogamous partnerships but are wondering what goes into the decision to open up your relationship. We talk through all the factors you may consider so you can make an informed decision at a pace you're comfortable with.

You might be disagreeing on how to adjust your agreements, or perhaps you know something wasn't working before but aren't sure exactly how to tweak things. We'll talk through what each of you wants and come to a place that works for everyone.

More people = more feelings. ENM is more complex by nature (that's what some people love about it)! But it can be a lot to navigate. Even if there are only two people in the therapy room, we'll look at the dynamics that are going on with other partners in your system.

Your partner is getting ready for their date and then suddenly, your nervous system is ringing the alarm. No, you are not "bad" at non-monogamy. What you're feeling makes sense. We'll work through feelings of jealousy and insecurity together.

New relationship energy is real. Even if you feel solid that ENM is for you, it can be really difficult (and sometimes destablizing) to see your partner excited and giddy about someone new. We'll explore rituals or opportunities for reconnection when your partner has less time for you, and how to bridge the time away from one another.

Your polycule is its own ecosystem, and what happens with one connection ripples through the rest. We'll help you navigate the dynamics between metamours, nested partners, and everyone in between. We can make space for more than two people in the therapy room. Head to the Rates page for details on fees.

Perhaps you want to have more sex, or you're the partner who is okay with less. This is one of the most common issues couples face in the bedroom. There are many factors that go into these differences in desire. We'll talk through them together and figure out what's standing in the way of having the sex life you want.

Shame is a socially enforced emotion that is instilled in us early on and often paralyzes us. Sexual shame is particularly tough to shake, especially if you grew up in an environment where it wasn't safe or the norm to ask questions about sex. We'll look at the role of shame in your life and examine the unhelpful parts so you can release yourself from them.

Purity culture and religious messaging can leave a lasting imprint on how you experience your body and sexuality, long after you've left the belief system behind. We'll work through the shame and reclaim a sexual connection to yourself and others.

While I am not an expert on kink, I am kink-affirming. We'll talk openly about BDSM and kink, aspects you're curious about, power dynamics, and pleasure without judgment.

When partners don't share the same orientation, it can raise questions about desire, identity, and what the relationship can look like. We'll navigate those questions together, with honesty and care for both of you.

Not every meaningful partnership includes sex, and that's not a problem to fix. We'll help you build on the strengths and gifts of your relationship, and figure out a way of being in relationship that supports everyone involved.

When something you want so badly feels just within reach, but out of your control at the same time, it can feel like a rollercoaster of emotion. Even though you may be navigating this journey together, partners each have their own unique experience, which can sometimes lead to feeling disconnected and isolated. We'll work through the fear, the cost, and grief of infertility.

A new baby usually means a new, and often unequal, division of labor. We'll take an honest look at who's carrying what, physically and mentally, and rebalance so resentment doesn't take root.

So much changes after baby: hormone shifts, sleepless nights, the birthing partner's relationship to their body, limited attention and energy, feeling "touched out"...the list goes on. Sex and intimacy can feel foreign and unfamiliar, even if it's something you both are yearning for.

Maybe you agree on everything, but you want to be on the same team. We'll work through differences in parenting philosophy so you're making decisions together instead of in conflict.

Nobody tells you how much having a baby changes the relationship. The exhaustion, the resentment, the loneliness, the love that's still there underneath it all. We'll work on expressing the emotions that often get lost in the hustle and bustle of parenthood.

Rarely do parents talk about the grief of saying goodbye to the person and couple you were before having a child. When your focus is all on this new tiny human, it can be easy to lose that sense of who you are. We'll process the emotions that come with shifting your identity, explore how you've changed, and who you want to be.

Preparing for a baby is about more than the nursery, it's about preparing your relationship for the shift ahead. We'll talk through expectations, fears, and how you want to show up for each other once the baby arrives.

When one or both partners are transitioning, the relationship transitions too, physically, emotionally, and in how you're seen by the world. We'll support you both through the changes, together.

Not every queer relationship shares the same orientation, and figuring out what that means for desire, identity, and commitment takes honesty and intentional conversation. We'll work through complexity of it all.

Coming out, being out, or simply existing as who you are can complicate relationships with the families you grew up in. We'll help you navigate the grief and help you set healthy boundaries with those you wish to remain connected to.

Leaving a faith that once held your identity can bring relief and grief in the same breath, especially when it also cost you community. We'll process the mix of emotions you may be feeling and identify what values you want to keep and which you wish to leave behind.

Desire and identity aren't always fixed, and when they shift within a long-term relationship, it can bring up big questions for both partners. We'll navigate that fluidity together, with curiosity instead of fear.

Maybe you're a parent who doesn't hear from your adult child anymore. Or you're a grown child who longs a relationship with someone who caused you pain. When distance has grown between you and a parent or adult child, and you want to understand what happened and find a way forward.

Illness, death, divorce, a new partner, a grandchild—moving through big life changes have a way of surfacing everything that's unresolved.

When generational or cultural gaps create distance between you and your family, we'll work toward bridging the understanding between you.

Therapy isn't reserved just for couples or families-of-origin/-creation. Rifts between chosen family or friendships can be just as painful and difficult to navigate. We'll create a space where you can express your emotions and reconnect with dear friends that are like family to you.